Life is good! No wait, good doesn't even begin to describe how spectacular, wonderful, magnificent, incredible, indescribably fantastic life is. It's not that life was bad before today, but for the first time I feel almost entirely emotionally healthy. I mean, yes I'm still a basket case, and yes I'll probably have to break out Taylor Swift, Moulin Rouge, and gallons upon gallons of ice cream through the rest of my life, but right now, I feel exceptional. It's that moment when everything falls into place. When I've been clinging onto something I knew I would lose, and suddenly, I am able to just look at it head on, and realize that it's time to let go.
But it's more than just being able to let go. Because I thought I had let go before, but now I can look back and see things the way they actually were, not gilded with the wonder of a love-sick, hopeless romantic who was putting all of his hopes into you. But not looking at things as a crushed, heartbroken wretched piece of a man who could only see every smile and compliment as some cruel feminine game to be played whenever boredom would strike you.
Finally it all seems healthy. I can look back, and acknowledge that we had fun. I can acknowledge that with you, when things seemed good I was happy, and when things seemed bad I was miserable. But I'm not relying on it anymore, because I don't need to. I don't need you, you don't need me, and neither of us even really want each other anymore.
And finally I don't hopelessly love you, and I don't callously hate you. I'm not even indifferent to you. I just wish you the best, and for the first time realize that it's time to strike out on my own. Thanks for helping mold me into the man I am, and thanks for making everything about this so easy.
